Big Booty Bubble Butt

And now let's talk about the elephant in the room.

What is going on with this giant ass business? Everyone is being desensitized by the Kim Kardashians of the world, including ME! Women with normal asses are being told they have pancake butts! And this is why:

I am just using her for an example, because I think she's the catalyst that sparked this bizarre trend.  As we all can clearly see below, Nikki Minaj, Iggy Izalea, Blac Chyna, and many many others (not shown) have jumped on the mutated booty bandwagon.

Looks like photoshop, doesn't it folks? Well, it isn't. These women actually think this looks GOOD. 

Now, don't get me wrong. I love a big booty...if it's REAL! If you are born with a natural big booty it can be very sexy. You can also build one! Look at Jen Selter! 

Now, do these chicks think they are fooling anyone? 

People claimed that the above picture of Kim and her BFF, Blac Chyna, was photoshopped. 

Let's examine that possibility for a moment.  

Um, okay.  Even if it were, that would mean they had this photoshopping done and thought it looked attractive?  Any way you look at it, it's freaky. Bun, I mean pun totally intended.

Wait! I almost forgot Khloe.

Girl, please. Nothing butt implants here.

I am not against surgical enhancement. That's the key word here, enhancement. I wouldn't exactly call this an "enhancement", would you? I have breast implants and regularly reveal that fact to anyone who is curious and asks. If I could have done push-ups until my old boobs came back (over 40 now) in their full glory, believe me, I would've opted for that rather than surgery. These hornswogglers could have squatted their way to a bigger, better, SEXIER booty in as little as 8 weeks. But they chose a different method.

Stop lying and own it, ladies. 

I remember the first time I noticed the suddenly freakish balloon-bubble butt on Kim, and I was literally shocked. It was painfully obvious that she had work done. And we all remember her famously showing us that x-ray indicating there were no implants in her badonkadonk.  There are no implants because it's called a FAT TRANSFER, people. Look it up. Basically you are told to stuff your face and gain at least ten to fifteen pounds,  then you get that fat liposuctioned out of your stomach, waist and thighs, and pumped right into your ass. 

Yes, really. 

Don't believe me? You think this is something she developed from squats?

Anyone who works out will scoff at this. Lazy women all over the world have praised the lord over and over for this innovative procedure. Can you imagine your doctor telling you to gain weight so that he can use it to enhance other parts of your body? Only in your dreams, right?

Ladies, there is no substitute for physical fitness. You will never imitate natural muscle tone. 

When Kim first stepped on the scene as Paris Hilton's assistant, everyone noticed the gorgeous brunette and wondered who she was. Years and years have gone by, and she has managed to bamboozle most people into thinking that her current ass is God-given, with no surgical enhancements whatsoever. 

Let's take a another quick look at her ass before:

A picture speaks a thousand words.

(By the way, I think she would rather shave her head with a cheese-grater than wear that atrocious outfit today)

I know I'm late to this big-booty party, but I had to get it out of my system.